Friday, March 30, 2007


X- Tubule ran an exhaustive survey of billions of American voters asking them what they were looking for in a woman president and what influenced their opinion. Here are the results in order of magnitude of the first 5.

Wanted – the perfect woman. She must be hot with huge breasts and Lana Turner legs. She must have a body to die for and a brain the size of a pea. Must wear a bikini at her inauguration or be naked.

Opinion was influenced by: TV and how my favorite movie stars look. Also from Hillary hater Tucker and Hard Balls Matthews’ fan clubs because Tuck and Chris constantly put forth this idea of the ideal female Chief Ex.
She must be a looker. No dog, ya know, since we’ll have to see her a lot on TV. Even a stud like ‘W’ got hard to look at after awhile with those beady little eyes and itchy nose sniffing.

Opinion influenced by: Watching those beautiful beasts on the wrestling shows - and all the girly-fluff that surrounds them; NASCAR attitudes; FOX Vixens and most of the Snuff films that pass themselves off as crime shows .
First off, a woman president should be a great cook and she must know how to sew or knit. She’ll be present in a lot of meetings with the men who are running the country and she needs to have something to do while they talk. Also, she should always bring home-cooked snacks for them.

Opinion influenced by: Oprah, The View and the Happy Housewives blog.
She must be God-fearing, that is she must know her place. She should arrange for daily religious services to be held all over the White House, the Senate and House of Representatives. She must keep the White House spotless and always obey her husband.

Opinion influenced by: The Southern Christian Men’s Conferences and the stalwart Buckles of the Bible Belt.
She must be intelligent and knowledgeable about world affairs. She must be experienced and willing to work hard and serve the people instead of starting wars. [Each respondent in this category also gave their Party preference]

Opinion influenced by: Reading a variety of newspapers from around the world; listening to different TV newscasts and research on WEB.
X – Tubule pollsters asked the respondents giving replies similar to the first 4 opinions listed above about their Party preference. To their surprise, Party did not appear to influence their choice where a woman president was concerned.

They figured a party was a party so, “Party on, Dude!”
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Friday, March 23, 2007


School is in and the teachers are magnificent! The Repugs have brought all the old, tried and true warhorses out of the barn to counteract the really bad smell emanating from the Bush administration.

The complete control of the media they used to have has slipped, especially since the last election that gave the Democrats the majority – thin though it is. But there is no panic, no whining, and no elephantine stampede of the type Democrats are famous for.

Quite the opposite, in fact. As layer after layer of Bush perfidy over the last six years is peeled back like an onion by responsible media, Repug representatives to Talk and TV put on a show that is not only worth watching, it should be mandatory for Democratic pols & pundits.

Looking even younger than she did six years ago when she was assaulting the Clinton administration, Mona Charin is back in town. We’ve aged and so have other pundits seen on TV, but not Mona.

She is still the master of creating white out of black, good out of bad and peace out of chaos without once losing a smile that is so baked-in that her face appears to be carved out of granite.

When challenged on the Lou Dobbs program, concerning the outing of Valerie Plame, she turned nary a hair in asserting that Plame had outed herself and besides, she never was a covert agent.

The other panelists raised their eyebrows in surprise. Hadn’t Mona heard Plame testify to her covert status under oath before Congress just recently? She had, but obviously Plame was lying.

Didn’t Mona follow the Scooter Libby trial and hear all the testimony? She had, but obviously all those testifying were lying. Didn’t she see all the e-mails that showed the scandal in the Attorney General’s Office? She had, but they had all been misrepresented. According to Mona, the Bush administration is still pure as the driven snow.

Mona is a master in the art of deception who makes the lies of the Repub talking points appear believable even against one’s better judgment. The danger is that the Repugs have closed ranks, brought back the big guns and have already shown that even in the minority they can defeat Dems legislative agendas.

Chris Matthews, the ultimate flip-flopper, who just finished several days criticizing Bush for the A.G. scandal, turned on a dime in one day pouring out admiration for Bush’s refusal to allow Rove and Miers to testify under oath. Chris actually gushed in admiration, calling Bush, a Tiger.

The Bush agenda: Deny every accusation; lie with conviction; smile decisively and make it appear that the Dems are lying bullies intent on turning America over to the terrorists and the gays.

So Dems, go to school on Mona and her ilk, reinforce your spine and learn how to take back your pride and professionalism. Do we want you to speak and act with absolute certainty, conviction and commitment? Do we mean you should get down and dirty like the Repugs?

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Friday, March 16, 2007


GenderGappers 2007 - 012


Our long national nightmare keeps going… and going… and going… - Or surging… surging… surging… if you prefer. Nearly two more years of Bush-unbound may signal the beginning of the end of Democracy in this country.

Already he has made a good start in nullifying many of the safeguards of the Constitution. He has done all this in the name of protecting us from terrorists. He has done this with our permission because of our terror.

Since Americans are terrified of losing their cars, TV’s, Blackberrys and all the other wonders of our technology, they have willingly let their freedom be vandalized.

And even now as the early presidential Primary takes a running start, it seems many Americans care little for a candidate’s qualifications for the job of president or are curious about their past records or their present inner circle.

We need a leader that knows how to clean house, not just one who will bring the garbage to the curb. We need one who has world contacts and governing experience – we elected a pretty boy last time – you remember, the one you wanted to sit down and have a beer with, George Bush?

Its déjà vu all over again as many empty heads salivate over some Mr. Mc Dreamy, who is cute, tells them the most lies about the country and themselves and they’d like to sit down and have a beer with.

One of GenderGapper’s subscribers writes us, in an exceptionally reasonable tone, that opposition to abortion is not about religion, it is about breaking the law. He claimed that raped women who have abortions have killed, and the government should treat them with the death penalty just as it does with other murderers.

He also contended that pedophiles who kill the children they assault should not be treated like murderers – they should be treated and released.

Violence against women is at an all time high. It is everywhere in political punditry, blogs and dark comedy. Just a few years ago, Liberals/Progressives had their first nation-wide talk radio – Air America Radio.

Now many of its stations have left and all over the country there are people whose only choice for political information is a plethora of right wing scandal mongers intent on feeding misinformation about candidates.

Streaming AAR programs seldom works for dial-ups and pods are too expensive. Are the Democrats doing this to hasten their own demise or don’t they care about taking this country back anymore?

All the TV channels have advocates, in the guise of journalist, for their favorite candidate. FOX blatantly touts the Republicans, but there is no TVaccess that does the same for Democrats.

The way things are going we’ll all be in deep do-do because of our fears and inaction so when the terrorist do come they’ll only have to bring shovels to clean up our mess.
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Friday, March 09, 2007


GenderGappers 2007 – 011


There is a play written by Jane Martin in 1993 called “Keely and Du”. It comes close to being fair to both sides of the abortion debate. The major characters are a young woman, Keely, who is seeking an abortion after being raped by her husband and Du, an older woman.

Du along with another anti-abortion extremist, a male minister, kidnaps Keely when she was on the way to terminate her pregnancy. Here we have the classic confrontation of free will and religion.

Legally, Keely has the right to have an abortion; but the minister and Du have the power to stop her by chaining her to a bed in a basement. Here most of the action is played out with Du watching over a very angry Keely.

The minister, who of course feels he has all the rights on his side due to his gender - being made in the image of God and his vocation as God’s representative on earth - at first calmly exhorts Keely.

She remains intractable and over the days and nights this angers the man to the point that he raves like the anti-abortion screamers that flock outside women’s clinics. Even Du finds him ridiculous and tells Keely that, “He is with God but he is insufferable about it.”

As the women spend more time together, they develop a friendship. They understand that they have much in common and, as women, can find amusement in the foibles of the raving minister.

Things do not end well in this play. How could they? Religion as always divides people, bringing hatred by the powerful and resentment by the weak. However males usually find what they think is a solution for the abortion debate in the play.

Because Keely and Du seemingly come to like and understand each other, mostly male reviewers of the play think that putting the two sides in one room together, just to talk quietly would bring a solution.

One such reviewer based this on Roe versus Wade suggest opposition [versus], whereas Keely and Du brings a word [and] of inclusion and togetherness and hope. He disregarded the 500 pound gorilla in the room – men’s religion which enslaves womankind.

But one real point of the play is to show that captivity and force of one gender by another just has no saving grace. Males cannot be raped and impregnated by a stronger, privileged gender and forced to continue a pregnancy because of the stronger, privileged gender’s religion.

They still don’t get it when they think religion and freedom can sit down in a room together and compromise. They never will as long as women’s bodies are owned by the state.
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Friday, March 02, 2007


GenderGappers 2007 – 010


How we used to long for the days when we could turn on the radio and get a LIBERAL TALK SHOW. Then came Air America and for some time it was great to hear all the voices speaking truth to power.

Sadly for us in the North Country, Liberal talk was deemed no longer necessary and was not supported, except for a low powered, mostly unmanned WTWK, giving us a few hours on weekdays of some old favorites [with the exception of Rachel Maddow].

In the last year, The Young Turks have been featured and have taken over most of the morning time. Following the exit of Al Franken, we lucked out by getting everyone’s favorite History Professor, Thom Hartmann for afternoons.

The Turks program features three people: two men and a woman – Cenk Uygur, Ben Mankiewicz and Jill Pike. The men talk all the time with a sentence or two allowed the one woman whom they usually present or characterize as drugged, hung over or a certified airhead.

This characterization gives you an idea of what they think of women generally and Jill usually cooperates by showing them to be correct in their evaluation of women’s intelligence and ability.

However, they do present the usual fare of criticizing the Republics, the Conservative Talk shows and the Congress with its failure to do anything about bringing home the troops. They urge that all Dem groups cooperate to elect a Democrat as president.

Unfortunately, they also feature the very things they criticize the Conservs for – one sided, unproven, unfair accusations and reports of our Democratic candidates.

They bring in the usual, mostly male reporters, bloggers, politicians and authors to give their opinions. Their guests most usually have positive or supportive things to say about the male candidates for president and the Turks themselves often state their own male preference.

So far, their choice of guest has not included even one person that has positive things to say about the one woman running or is one of her supporters. And the Turk loud talker, who apparently suffers from hormonal imbalances, is not shy about iterating and reiterating his hatred of the woman candidate.

He, like many of their guests, faithfully parrot the dirt and lies fed the media by the Right Wing all during the Clinton years. They even use the exact terms and sentences.

Who needs Liberal Talk when we can turn back the pages and read what the Conservative polls, pundits, authors and anyone that hates had to say about Hillary?

We don’t expect that they should not present their opinions but we do expect a Liberal Talk group to be fair. Right now, the loudest Turk is screaming about how Dems must stick together and support their candidates. Quick! Someone get the guy a Midol.

Oh for the clarity and fairness of Rachel once again.

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